This is an age when discipline takes on a new meaning. The method depends on each family; however one practice that rarely works is slapping or hitting yet this method is resorted to by many parents. Another concern you may have is your child still sucking from a bottle. The toddler social world continues to expand. This may be the best time to put your child into a playgroup as he enjoys being with his age-mates.

• wave bye-bye
• stand alone
• put an object into a container
• use mama/dada intentionally
• follow 1-step verbal command

• bend over and pick an object
• walk well

Things your toddler may possibly do AT THIS STAGE

• dump an object in imitation
• use 3 recognizable words
• scribble

• build a tower of 2 cubes/blocks
• use 6 words or more
• run
• walk up steps
• follow a 2 step verbal command without gestures

Your toddler will probably use both hands equally. Some show a preference for using either right or left hand when playing, feeding or drinking but there is no consistency until they reach about 3 years of age. The preferred hand is genetically determined. If both parents are right-handed there is a 98% chance of their child being so too. When one parent is left handed, there is a 17% likelihood of a child being a leftie and where both parents are left-handed chances increase to 50%. Don't try to influence your toddler into using one hand over the other; he will use the one he feels most comfortable with or is natural to him. Discipline should be thought of in the immediate context as well as the long term; the latter refers to the approach that will be employed on your child throughout his preschool years, discipline is after all a matter of philosophy and parents must form their own philosophy

Contact with new sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and touches is what makes your toddler think and that's why stimulation of all the five senses is essential from birth. In order for his understanding of his surroundings to increase, he must use his senses, his intellect and his body to form mental connections so that he understands cause and effect. For example in order to pick up his favorite toy he must be able to see it, remember that he likes it, reach for it and then pick it up.

Discipline is not the same as punishment; it is about teaching your child what is expected of him both within the family circle and the society at large. It should be done with love and respect for your toddler. Discipline takes many forms; from your sharp 'NO' to the big hug you give when he has done something that makes you proud. These are ways you guide your child's behavior. Wide consensus on this topic point out that the goals of discipline are to help a child learn to cooperate, to follow rules of conduct and over time to become self-disciplined so that control from others isn't necessary. Parents should consider discipline in both the immediate and the long term. Long term refers to the overall approach throughout the preschool years. Another point to remember is that discipline is more a matter of philosophy and it is not a simple, straight cut matter. There are many conflicting opinions on it. Every child is unique so an approach may work on your friend's child but not on your child; what works for one child in your family may not work with the other sibling. Don't expect too much obedience; learning will be gradual as your toddler has a very short memory span and doesn't recall lessons unless repeated over time.

The positive approach:

Discipline requires a positive approach using lots of praise and encouragement and setting a good example through adult behavior. Hitting a child conveys that it is ok to smack. Spanking or hitting is also less effective in gaining your child's cooperation than letting her know how much her behavior displeased you. Spanking most likely has little long-term, negative effects if used sparingly. If you want good behavior it is important to praise her when she does something right; noticing good behavior and commenting specifically about it is important. Your toddler wants to please you and pleasing you makes her feel good. Praising her efforts shows your respect of her efforts which will also develop her self esteem.

Effective intervention:

Distracting your toddler when he is not cooperating is quite effective; for example when he refuses to put on his shoes, distract him with a toy and then put on the shoe on him while he is playing. At the same token you should ignore some unwanted behavior especially when it becomes attention seeking. Your intervention is necessary when the situation merits it. For example when your toddler intentionally throws a toy car which may hit another child, intervene and explain that such behavior is unacceptable.



Be clear:

Your child can't think ahead and is incapable of basic choices. When you decide how you want him to behave, your communication should be clear. This means being brief. It also means being setting limits firmly. As he reaches for the hot stove, hold him back with a firm 'NO' and explain why briefly. If you want him to stop throwing blocks, tell him so immediately and be prepared to remove him from the scene or the blocks right away. Again, offer him a brief and simple explanation for your behavior.

Be consistent:

Consistency is very important. However there may be minor conflicts due to differences in parenting rules of the two parents. Try to keep these differences to a minimum; serious inconsistencies can be confusing to your toddler and may make it harder for him to learn your rules. Reach a compromise with your partner and stick with your decisions.

Avoid confrontation:

By far the most common reason for disciplining was when he touched something he shouldn't. Effective toddler-proofing can greatly reduce conflicts between parents and child. Move precious objects, breakables out of his reach. Most toddlers have a tough time keeping their hands off things. Though toddlers understand the rule of not touching, they still do it because they are not able to resist the temptation. It is therefore important to toddler-proof your home until he is older. With you being firm and consistent he will touch less and less.
1. Keep things out of toddler's reach which you feel are dangerous or valuable.
2. Make safe those items that cannot be removed. Put safety caps in electrical outlets; put mesh type safety gates on all stairways or out of bound areas.
3. Certain areas cannot be toddler-proofed; use clarity and consistency.

Try substituting:

Your toddler is beginning to understand acceptable behavior, even if he has little self-control. Substituting acceptable item for an untouchable can help. For instance give him his own selection of books or old useless CDs when he won't leave your bookshelves or CD rack alone.

Criticize the behavior not your child:

When your child breaks a rule, let him know that you are displeased with what he has done, not with him. This action will highlight his wrongdoing to him yet letting him save face. If you criticize the child you are not only attacking his self-esteem but also not letting him know why you are angry.
These strategies take time and patience but by using them you are helping your child learn some very positive lessons for life. Learning about discipline is also the beginning of learning about self-discipline. If through positive discipline you can help your toddler learn that it is a particular sort of behavior that gets attention and praise (good behavior), you are sowing the seeds for your child's ability to manage her behavior well in the future. There is no right or wrong approach to discipline because each child and each parent is an individual. The most important thing is finding the right balance that your family is comfortable with.

You need not be concerned if your 14 month old does not say his words clearly (if he is saying any words at all). Most speech sounds are difficult to make, especially those that involve complex coordination of the tongue, lips, nose, teeth and larynx. Sounds like sh, spa, spra, ch and th are frequently mispronounced even by 3 year olds. A toddler frequently substitutes a simpler sound for one more difficult: that becomes dat, pretty is pronounced pitty and the like. A toddler has problems with sounds at the middle and end of some words: you may hear basik for basket, baw for ball and docket for doctor just to name a few. One way to aid your toddler is by making sure you yourself are pronouncing words correctly and completely. There are times when understanding your toddler can be quite a task, more so when you are not in a positive frame of mind. Your inability to decipher him in turn enrages him. Remember that he is trying his best and he may be just as frustrated as you are by his inability to pronounce correctly. Pay close attention to what he is trying to say and every signal he is making by staying collected. Apologize briefly for your lack of comprehension if it can ease the situation.

Boys and girls have different strengths and will develop differently. Generally girls in comparison to boys:

• Do better at language-based skills like talking, reading and writing
• Tend to be more sociable and are more interested in people than things
• Usually walk earlier
• Grow faster and are more predictable and regular in their development patterns
Are better at jumping, hopping and balance in the preschool years
Are easier to get on with and cope better with stress
In the preschool years girls are better at jumping, hopping and rhythmic movement and balance so they will enjoy games that involve these. Hopscotch, dancing, skipping games will give your little girl the chance to develop these skills

The pace of development in terms of physical, intellectual or social are affected by issues and gender is one such issue; boys and girls develop according to different timetables. Generally boys in comparison to girls:

• Begin to talk at a later stage and are more prone to language disorders
• Tend to be less sociable and more interested in objects than in people
• Usually walk later
• Are more likely to grow in sudden spurts
• Are more aggressive, competitive and rebellious
• Get better at jumping, running and throwing after the preschool years
• Are more vulnerable to stress and are more likely to have behavioral problems
• Young boys achieve jumping, hopping, rhythmic movement and balancing skills less quickly so they tend to reach certain milestones later such as picking up a toy from the floor without sitting down first. You should therefore give your little boy plenty of help with achieving these skills by allowing him freedom of movement. Games that involve kicking a ball or dancing and jumping games will increase his skills.

Books provide a focus for a quieter time, allowing your child to begin enjoying stories and imagination. At this stage books are not about learning to read - they are about enjoying stories for their own sake and learning to focus and listen, important skills for later use. Books also lend a feeling of security by allowing you and your toddler to return to old favorites time and time again.

• You will have to teach your toddler how to look at and take care of books. Choose sturdy, wipeable board books; these pages are easier for little fingers to turn. Keep these books within easy reach of baby so she can choose them on her own.

• Look at them together with you reading the words. Explain things clearly when you have your toddler's attention and take time to discuss pictures. This also provides a chance for you to bond with your toddler. Reading with your toddler can be done at any time of the day for the sake of reading or to quieten down e.g. before bed time.

• Ensure there is no background noise when you are reading. Turn off the television, radio so that it is possible for her to really focus on your voice as you read the words.

• Sit with your baby closely held in your lap. Hold the book in such a way that she can see the pictures clearly and begin reading. Give your baby enough time to look at each page.

• Respond to your baby's reactions to the pictures or the story. Enjoy her enjoyment.