Smacking as a means of discipline has been practiced for a long time in many families. Most experts feel that smacking is not effective. Children who are smacked often refrain from repeating an action out of fear and no other reason. Instead of learning the difference between right and wrong, they end up differentiating what they got smacked for and what they did not get smacked for. They will rarely learn self-discipline. Smacking also sets a violent example; children who are smacked are more likely to use physical force against peers and later against their own kids. If children learn that the best way to settle a dispute is with force, they are denied the chance to learn alternative less painful ways of dealing with anger and frustration.





Smacking is humiliating and demeaning to both the parent and the child, often shattering self-esteem and morale. Smacking can also lead to injury especially when it happens in the heat of the moment; smacking after the anger has subsided cause less physical injury but becomes more questionable. Baby sitters and caregivers should be instructed never to hit your child or to inflict any form of physical punishment. If your child is at a daycare or nursery, be sure to check there are policies that prohibit corporal punishment. Some parents believe that a smack on the hand or bottom is necessary in a dangerous situation to convey the appropriate message across to a child too young to understand words. The idea is not to inflict pain but to quickly call the child's attention to the seriousness of the situation. Such a slap should be followed by an explanation; once your child shows that she understands what you say, physical force should be avoided since language is enough!



When Smacking becomes Abuse


Parents rarely hurt their child intentionally; most child abusers inflict punishment either out of anger or because they believe they are doing it for the child's benefit. Anything more than a smack on the bottom can injure a child, especially a young child. Shaking can be especially damaging to the infant or toddler. Using a belt, ruler or other weapon is extremely dangerous. If you ever feel your anger out of control, get help. Call your neighbor or friend who lives nearby. Many parents who would never hit their child feel perfectly safe shaking them as a way of punishing them, showing their anger or displeasure. This isn't a safe practice and may backfire; although a toddler's neck muscles are stronger than an infant's, shaking can still in the 2nd and 3rd year of life, cause serious injury to the eyes and/or brain.